Unfortunately, that is a question I have been asking myself a lot lately. It seems like I jumped on a time machine and landed in middle school. You remember middle school right? The time when everyone was “finding” themselves and learning how to be really nasty to other people if they didn’t agree with or like what other said people were doing. Ugh, I was so glad that time was behind me. The bullying, the name calling, the whispers and just downright mean behavior. Oh but wait it happens again when you are an adult. Don’t get me wrong I am no angel. I catch myself gossiping and criticizing others too. But I really thought that being an adult meant we were all going to try to act like it.
I try very hard to be conscious of what I am doing and saying especially around kids. They are so impressionable and what adults say and do in front of them they will go and do the same. I wish everyone would could try to watch themselves as well. Again, I am not perfect and things slip but when they do I try to explain that is was wrong of me to say or do that.
Back to us “adults” More than once I have wondered things like “Am I at the grocery store or back in middle school gym class?” Or the even better ponder “Am I at work or on the playground?” I guess I was wrong in assuming that people should and would be held to a higher professional standard when they were working. Between all of the tattling and backstabbing the workplace can get really old. I mean can’t we just do what we came here for? You know that thing called work; let’s try that. Let’s face it we are all different and unique human beings. We are not always going to see eye to eye and we all have different opinions on how things should get done. We don’t all have to be best friends but we do have to work together. Work can sometimes be stressful enough without all of this childish behavior. (I know I am not working right now; just basing this on fond memories) Sometimes when I go out and about I am wearing yoga pants. To me that is perfectly acceptable. They are usually black or grey in color and I don’t feel that they are too tight. Other times I go shopping I am wearing jeans with a scarf or nice top. Apparently the cereal aisle has turned into the catwalk and I missed the memo. I thought I was just at the store to pick up some cereal not be judged by my outfit.
I see tons of stories on bullying all over social media. These kids go to school and get ridiculed on what they look like, how they dress or their likes and dislikes. I like to follow my old standard “If you are nice to me and treat me with respect, I will like you back.” I really could care less if your shirt has a hole in it or you like to (gasp) read books. If you are nice and friendly to me I will be the same to you. You kind of can predict that kids are going to be mean to each other at some point because they are learning how this world works. But we as adults should know better.
Then there is social media. Ugh. I love it and I hate it. Sometimes logging into Facebook is like walking into the cafeteria and not having anyone to sit with. Then we have the lovely passive aggressiveness or the straight out calling people on their shit. Well guess what I feel it is better to pick up the phone and call that person instead of re-posting something that nobody really knows what the heck you are talking about anyway. Then assumptions are made and we are back in middle school.
Nobody is perfect and I am fully aware of that. We are all going to say things that we don’t mean out of anger or frustration. But let’s try to take a step back and really think about what is going to fly out of our mouth. It is a lot more calming and pleasant to be nice to each other than being rude and mean. You never know what is going on with someone else in their personal life so know the whole story or try to before you judge. We are supposed to be adults and be an example for others. Let’s try to do that. Maybe in the future we can just say we’re all adults with no question.